026 Post It!

Preparation sponsors confidence.

At my place of work, we have this beautiful thing we do where every month, we read a policy book. In this book club, we read a book nominated and chosen by the team. We read it, and on the last Friday of the month, we convene to discuss our thoughts, whether we agree or disagree with the author, and how we can translate the book’s central idea into our current reality in Nigeria.

Since I started working there, I have listened to the books of the month because one of my biggest fears is exposing ignorance, and the worst horror movie would be me not having anything to say when I am called upon. At the beginning of this year, I told myself that if I took all 12 books seriously, by the end of the year, my brain would be able to tell the difference. Fast forward to this month, May, my best girl took up the challenge to present the book of the month, and she asked me to moderate the discussion session.

The Damola I know would have had every reason to say no and tell her to find someone else, but seeing Nini accepting a challenge showed me I could do the same. (In that, I saw the need to be intentional about the people around you, coupled with the confidence she had in me that made her ask me in the first place).

Every day, I listened to and read a chapter. I incorporated it into my lifestyle, listened when I was getting my steps in, reading on the treadmill at the gym after work and sending screenshots to her to keep her updated on my progress. We would even discuss the book in the office on some days and assure ourselves that we’ve got this.

What this season taught me is that confidence is sponsored by preparation. I felt my disposition towards the book club meeting change as I learned more about the book. I made it a mission to read reviews, getting opposing and concurring views, and forming my own opinions. I knew my stuff, and my shoulders began to rise (I am not proud, I promise, but the way I would have cowered if I was not as sure was absent).

What surprised me the most was not how much I learned from the book itself, but how much my fear had exaggerated the challenge before I started preparing. Before then, moderating the discussion felt like standing at the edge of a cliff. I imagined difficult questions, awkward silences, and moments when everyone would suddenly realize I was not as knowledgeable as they thought. The responsibility seemed bigger than my capacity.

But preparation has a funny way of shrinking mountains.

The more I read, the less intimidating the assignment became. The more familiar I became with the arguments in the book, the more comfortable I felt discussing them. Somewhere between chapter summaries, podcast reviews, and conversations with colleagues, the impossible slowly became manageable.

It made me realize how often we deny ourselves opportunities by focusing on our current capacity rather than our potential.

We look at a leadership position and immediately think about everything we do not know. We are invited to speak somewhere, and we start listing all the reasons we are not qualified. We are presented with a new responsibility at work, and our first instinct is to find someone more capable to hand it over to. We assume that because we cannot do it today, we will never be able to do it.

What if the gap between where we are and where we need to be can simply be bridged by preparation?

I think many of us overestimate talent and underestimate preparation. We see people who speak eloquently, lead confidently, or execute difficult assignments successfully, and we assume they possess some special quality we do not. What we often do not see are the hours spent reading, researching, practicing, failing, revising, and trying again.

We admire the performance and ignore the preparation.

The truth is, most confidence isn’t natural. Most confidence is earned. It is built in the quiet moments when nobody is watching. It is built when you choose to study rather than avoid the task. It is built when you decide to ask questions rather than pretend you understand. It is built when you spend time preparing for an opportunity that has not even arrived yet.

The irony is that avoiding opportunities because we feel unprepared guarantees that we remain unprepared. The only way to become capable is to step toward what intimidates us and give ourselves enough time and commitment to learn.

I think about how close I came to saying no.

Had I declined, I would have avoided discomfort, but I would also have missed the growth that came from accepting the challenge. I would have remained convinced that moderating a policy discussion was beyond me. Instead, I discovered that I was capable of far more than I initially thought.

Not because I suddenly became smarter.

Not because I woke up one day with extraordinary confidence.

But because I prepared.

There is a version of us that exists on the other side of preparation. A version that asks better questions, contributes more thoughtfully, accepts bigger opportunities, and trusts itself more. Unfortunately, many people never meet that version because they walk away before giving preparation a chance to work.

So the next time an opportunity presents itself and your first instinct is to say, “I can’t do this,” perhaps the better question is, “Can I prepare for this?”

Those are two very different questions.

One focuses on your limitations today.

The other focuses on your potential tomorrow.

And more often than not, the answer is yes.

You can prepare. You can learn. You can practice. You can grow into the person the opportunity requires.

Because in many cases, the difference between those who step forward and those who step back is not talent, intelligence, or luck.

It is preparation.

Confidence is sponsored by preparation.