030 Post It!

the struggle in the unknown

Hmmmmm,

Where do I start with this one?

I definitely cannot share the details of this one, but I trust I can bare my heart whilst still being coded about it. Trust me, I would like to share, but this is indeed bigger than me, and I am still hoping in God for the grace to get through this.

This is the first time in my life that I am totally helpless and cannot fathom my next step. I am going to try as much as possible not to ramble and let you in on what is really going on.

Wow, imagine thinking you have it figured out, that you know what the next few years would look like, and that you are so sure this is the best that could possibly happen to and for you. But somewhere along the line, factors that you have no control over, and both parties actually have no control over, stand in the way and hold the power to rip to shreds the perfect painting that not only have you fallen in love with, but you have also actually begun to run with. Bro, it is well.

Imagine a heart that you have shielded for years on end, finally allowed to function as it should, doing perfectly even, and one day, the danger you eventually encounter, that shield would not have even been able to save you from the attack you are currently facing. I asked God a simple question. WHY?

Why did I protect my heart for so long, only to encounter this kind of (I honestly don’t know what to call it)? What did I do to deserve it?

Omdayys, I cannot even continue, my eyes are tearing up, I cannot cry, I am a big girl😭😭😭